Saturday, December 5, 2009

Christmas specials and warm fuzzies.

Tonight my post is dedicated to the epic Christmas Special. Every year about this time I spend endless afternoons on the couch sucked into lifetime's or various other network's Christmas shows. The way that they are overly predictable, that they always involve a mysterious character that works things together so the outcome is perfect, and that Christmas spirit always works in some Scrooge's heart which allows the scrooge to make a huge contribution to the main character, it all just gives me warm fuzzies.
Once when I was a little girl I wrote to Santa and asked him to bring me a twin sister. Of all things a TWIN!! Somehow I missed the reality of genetics and how babies are born
(perhaps this was back before I knew that the stork was a myth). Although looking back on this request I am going to blame the "Christmas Special". In these shows anything is possible. People find out they have a twin, they get new mommys and daddies, they find a new wife or husband, they get free homes, they are healed form all sorts of ailments, little siblings that are in foster care are allowed to come live with them (this last example is from a recent show I watched in which, for no apparent reason, an adult sister was not allowed to have custody of her young brother, their parents had died in a tragic accident in the past. So at the last minute the social worker had a change of heart-see my scrooge analogy above- and gave her custody, and to top it off the adult sister rekindled past love with her high school boyfriend and he proposed...HOW PERFECT!!!! I am getting warm fuzzies just recalling it!) So it is because of examples like this that I blame the fact that I asked Santa for a twin sister. (Side note- Santa did write me back that year. I know, I am that important that Santa wrote me back. I just found out this year that the US postal service had a program that wrote back to kids from Santa. I always wondered how that worked. I never did ask my parents about it because it kept the magic of Christmas alive not knowing if it was them or not.)
I am sorry to inform you all that my life is NOT a Christmas special and so Santa did not bring me a twin sister. However, I am sure I got some cool toys. In the spirit of Christmas Specials this year I will be wishing for a free home. I would like the one from Miracle on 34th street(In that movie she got a new daddy, a home, and a new found belief in St. Nick!).

I hope all of you have time to lounge on the couch for an afternoon sipping hot cocoa and taking in the magic of the season by watching a mindless yet oddly fulfilling Christmas Special.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

I propose a confrontation class.

Once a year my best friend and I have a huge knock down HUMUNGO fight. I am the opinionated person who can put it all out there and sometimes not realize I have offended someone and she is the person who wants everyone to be happy and truly has very little of a backbone to stand up to her overbearing bff. We lack the essential communication skills to understand each other. However, we love each other and both never have stopped fighting for our friendship. Watching other people I feel that this is a common problem. Just plain lack of communication skills.
MAYBE!!! We should require all students to take a communication class and learn how to resolve conflict. - But that is just my overly opinionated opinion. =)
I think we all need to remember that women want to be pursued. Even if it is in friendship. So if you have a friend out there that you aren't pursuing try a little harder. Pick up the phone, make the first call. Encourage them. Let go of the false perceptions that you have about your friends and love them. Friendships fade and they won't always last forever, but if both people aren't in it, if both aren't trying and both aren't pursuing each other...its not gonna work. At lease in the girl world. So be the bigger person and if both people are being the bigger person it will work out.
But again, that is just my overly opinionated opinion. -La

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Holiday Traditions

Sunday night Dan and I put up our christmas tree. I work the thanksgiving holiday so I decided we should do it a bit early just so I don't feel sad about missing thanksgiving. We enjoyed putting out our tiny collection of decorations and putting up or charlie brown tree. We truly should add something to the tradition...any ideas? Like a fun dinner...fondu decorating fun night maybe? Or chinese take out and christmas decorating night.... I will have to give this some thought.
One of our other traditions is the weekend after thanksgiving we have Steaksgiving. Its pretty much the same as thanksgiving except we eat leftovers from thanksgiving and then steak instead of turkey... This year will be our second annual steaksgiving. I am thankful for steaksgiving this year since I have to miss out on thanksgiving. (I would also like to add we are still thankful on steaksgiving....probably more thankful actually cause we are having steak instead of bird...just saying)
My FAVORITE holiday tradition(and I think my moms least favorite) is our Christmas Eve open house. It is a time where my parents make their house all clean and shiny...whip out the christmas music...the house is all decorated beautifully...our stockings are hung by the chimney...(you get the picture) And then we invite over 75 (turn out is around 35) of our closest friends/family and people we have just met to come over and celebrate on christmas eve with us. We have a ton of food. My mom makes steak soup (we obviously have a think for steak in our house...although I think you acutally use ground beef in steak soup) there are tons of snacks...homemade rolls (my dad should have been a bread kidding here!) So everyone just comes by and enjoys meeting people and celebrating the holiday together. My mom wanted to cancel it this year cause of the economy and it would be a stress financially to do the food. My vote is to make it potluck....People get that we are in a recession.I am sure they would be happy to bring something. Christmas eve is my FAVORITE holiday tradition. I love seeing people I haven't seen for a year and just enjoying the magic of christmas time. That is the only time of year that I still get that feeling I did when I was a little kid. And the best part...this year I get to go home and spend my first christmas with my husband. =)


Monday, November 16, 2009

Playing House

Dan and I spend this week watching my two favorite kiddos while their parents took a much needed vacation. We got to do all types of fun activities and I built some muscles carrying around a baby and sometimes a 3 year old.
Fletcher And me cheesing it up.
The the last morning we watched them was Fletchers birthday. His parents had an early flight so didn't miss much. But here is a cute morning birthday picture and then him trying to hold up three fingers to tell us how old he is. Its hard to hold up just three fingers for kids.
We made a robot head out of his build-a-bear box. He kept saying he was a we made him one.
Early morning pic. Hard to get a good one of the three of us, especially with the active 3 year old

This is Morley. She is the most lovely baby I have ever met.(I know lovely is an old word...however is just FITS with her. She is Lovely!) She rarely cries and brightens everyones day with her smile. People oohhh'd and ahhh'd over her when we went out cause she is just so SMILEY!! I was thinking it would stink to get up in the night to feed her, but it was enjoyable because how can you not be happy when a baby is so happy to see you! Even in the middle of the night.
It was a wonderful week and more than anything it was WONDERFUL to see my husband in the "Dad" role. He is good at so many things, however, he will be a wonderful dad. It was cool to watch him with the Morley and how he is with a baby. But the fact that he would get down to fletchers level and just spend time making him feel special meant so much to me. I am lucky to have him, and his kids will be lucky to have a dad like him.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Lovely day in the Neighborhood

It seems that we have been blessed with unusually great November weather. Today and Yesterday were BEAUTIFUL. Yesterday(FRI) Mira and I met my friend Becky and her Hubby Lewis and their incredibly cute dog Lucy at the Dog park. It went kinda like this. Lucy is the sweet loyal dog(if it was High School she would be the quiet, loving and very LOYAL friend) . She met Mira, was immediately friendly and then when the big dogs started picking on Mira she barked at them and stood up for her new pal. Mira also liked lucy yet was not as loyal as Lucy. (Mira is the H.S. girl that is friends with the quiet loyal girl, but also wants to hang out with the "cool kids"- who in the end turn out to be jerks, in dog world they were just two boxers that sandwiched her and drooled all over her head and threw her to the ground) I also enjoyed meeting Lewis and hanging out with Becky. Sadly we had to leave early because Mira was running so hard (her overprotective mommy was worried about her leg and made them leave...sounds just like a H.S. girls mom huh!!) but it was still fun.

I have a few new is a new band I am loving. Dan and I went to the Saving Abel concert last friday and had a great time. Little did I know I would love the Bands CD. Self titled it is a very good lyrical mix of hard rock and ballads.

Also- It seems that ZhuZhu pets (battery operated hamsters that interact with each other and their toys) will be all the rage this christmas so Dan and I are pulling a "Schrute" and going to stock up and sell them on Ebay. So I will be at walmart and toys R us this AM to get ZHU ZHUs...Might sound fishy, but we have bills to pay . Thanks to the girls at work that have kids for this tip off. Hopefully my plan succeeds.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Halloween fun!

So here are some pictures of our fun filled halloween. We visited my parents with the dog...who hates the camera, and that explains the quality of the pictures. She was a chicken...she also hated her costume. Then we went to a halloween party with some friends. It was a modest halloween party- cause we are modest people here. And then of course our one and only halloween decoration a jayhawk pumpkin from the Andersons.

Dan and I were peanut butter and jelly. When we hugged we became a sandwich..

Amanda and Andy Indian and Coyboy
Amelia & Shawn, Bee and bee sing victim
Janell and Marcus Camper and camp fire
emily & Wyatt ... Dwight Schrut & Princess Unicorn barbie (He collected these and sold them during the christmas episode in season 5)
Jacy & Brian, Baker and Bun in the oven...although she doesn't look preggo we are all very excited for baby cox.
Bee & Bee Keeper (Suzy & Andrew)
Paige Hadorn- Rubeus Hagrid
And then us and our little Chicken...literally.
She doesn't look at the camera cause it frightens her...

Thursday, October 29, 2009

DANCE TRAIN STATION BELGIUM do-re-mi The Sound of Music - Julie Andrews

Thanks to my friend becky for this wonderful video. Flash dances seem to be "ALL THE RAGE" this year. Oprah opened her new season with a flash dance, there are hundreds of videos on you tube about them. Kinda a cool idea. So watch out if you find yourself in a public place and music breaks out, you may just be experiencing a FLASH DANCE!!!

Sunday, October 25, 2009


I have two sweet surprises to tell about tonight! First a little back story, that applies to both things actually. If you have been reading this blog or caught me in a moment of stress (there have been two months full of moments now) you probably already know this stuff. Dan and I have been having a rough couple of months. Firstly, we have been encountering all sorts of health problems that have made our budget quite tight. So I have been working extra shifts and dan has been working to catch up in school and then working his job at Starbucks. So we have been seeing each other very little. So I may of (or absolutely did) had a little break down before work saturday night. And my very sweet husband instead of getting defensive or hurt just listened and told me everything would be okay. So my first sweet surprise came when I got home from work this morning. Waiting for me on my bed (Dan sleeps on the couch when I work...don't ask me why!) was a scattering of "flower petals" that were actually notes of encouragement.

Now, I am fully aware that these notes do not look remotely like flower petals. (Infact, I think they truly resemble dinosaur foot prints...) But to me they are more beautiful and more lovely than any flowers I have ever seen! (And be warned the comment about me being a great mother is a purely futuristic reference and not due to anything growing in my uterus!)

The Second Surprise came when we were out tonight. We went to look for a shelf to put in our laundry room. So then I wasn't ready to go home so we stopped at Wal-mart just cause it was right next to home depot. We decided to get groceries while we were there! Did you all know that buying groceries at Wal-mart is MUCH cheaper than the normal grocery store?!?! I have been seeing commercials advertising that they are cheaper but HOLY GOSH IT IS TRUE!!! We spent 50$ on groceries...much less than normal (probably about 30$) and hold on to your seats- WE BOUGHT A LOT OF NAME BRAND STUFF!!! even splurged on a few "smart ones" (my fav meal for lunch at work) and EL Fudge cookies!! I mean we are taking MAJOR SAVINGS HERE!!! Before all the health issues came about we always shopped at ALDI...a very cost effective store. However, their food generally is high in sodium. So today I felt hope again that our grocery budget could go back down. From now on I will drive the extra 1 1/2 miles to Walmart to save probably close to 80 bucks a month! I know this seems like a small deal, but the budget is tight so all savings help! So Sorry if my SHAMELESS Wal-mart plug offends your small town values or dislike of huge corporations, however I am very impressed and will now advertise because I am impressed.
So here is to sweet surprise sunday! And of course I have to add, which is a bit repetitive from the above story and pictures but...MY HUSBAND ROCKS! I am so lucky to have him.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

My Playlists

Tomorrow (Sunday) is Our big "Spring Cleaning Day"!!! Now I am fully aware of the fact that it IS NOT SPRING...and usually people aren't so excited to clean...However, We renewed our lease and since we have been living there a year now, it is time to spend a day DEEP CLEANING and ORGANIZING to make our tiny living space...livable.
So in lieu of updating you all on my dramatic overly stressed life (sorry becky, you already got the rundown tonight but thanks for listening, and understanding) I am going to talk about a neutral subject that is pretty common. MUSIC- People often ask the question "What kind of music do you like". I always thought that was an odd question. I don't know exactly what I like, and most of it isn't popular or a genre I can even explain. So here it is...
Relent K is my ALL TIME FAVORITE BAND!! They have the best music that I consider lyrically strong and very witty. Their albums have titles such as mmmmhhhmmm...., Four score and seven years ago, Anatomy of the tongue and cheek, ect ect. Their songs relate to the average persons life and they have a good beat. I looked it up and it is punk/pop as far as genre.
songs include "Which to bury us or the hatchet" "who I am hates who I've been" "High of 75" (which is about the weather) Good music and great lyrics. Check them out!
I also LOVE worship music and listen to that most frequently. Check out Hillsong United and Jon Shirley (itunes). Jon shirley happens to be the worship leader at our church, however his album "Heaven Hear Us" is very good.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Have you ever felt so burdened for someone/something that you can't stand it. Has the Lord ever placed something like that in your life? Something you dream of, wake in the middle of the night and pray for and just feel constantly broken hearted and burdened about?
As christians we are called to bare each others burdens. So I guess that is what I will do.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Things i'm loving

So it is Friday (Which obviously means I missed Laws of LA thursday...don't worry there will be more thursdays to come) And it also means I should be doing MY HUSBAND ROCKS...which I will later today. However, for now I want to share a few things that I am LOVING.

GLEE!!!! So I have caught the Glee fever. I loved high school. I find myself getting caught up in the drama of it all. Not to mention that musicals make my heart go pitter-patter. So when when they add in very fun, songs it is pretty much a complete package as far as Sit-coms go. (my bestie admitted her treason today buy saying glee was as highly ranked as the office in her world...don't worry EM its that high in my world too, but we won't tell anyone.)I know my husband gets annoyed at my constant singing/re-performing of the numbers after I have watched an episode.
"Just keep holding on, we're gonna make it through, make it through." (just imagine not so wonderful singing and ridiculous choreography added)

My north face Denali...I know these jackets are overpriced and my best friend things they are even kinda ugly...however I LOVE MY North face!! Since Kansas hasn't heard of fall and we have gone from 75degrees to 45 degrees in a matter of days...the north face has leaped out of
hibernation and is now getting plenty of use again. Easy to wash, Warm while being light weight, its just BLISS~

I am also LOVING cardigans. I have a green one that I am particularly fond of at this point. I do not own this specific cardigan, however it is a good representation of what I am loving this fall. Pair it with a tshirt, a tanktop, jeans, a dress, leggings. It is a very versatile piece.
Not only a wonderful masterpiece of a movie (okay maybe that is an exaggeration, but it's my favorite movie!!) And let's face it, can it get much better than meg ryan and tom hanks? But, it is just a fall staple in my world (I own two copies, JUST IN CASE I misplace, loose, break, scratch, It is witty, has a wonderful soundtract, is a love story, brings back memories because of the AOL log in sound and dialup-sound...(NO MATTER THE MEMORIES the sound of DIALUP BRINGS....THE MAN THAT CREATED HIGH SPEED INTERNET IS MY HERO) It is a fall classic...because after all doesn't everyone love the smell of scotch tape? And desire to receive a bouquet of sharpened pencils?
CHECK IT OUT! I know you'll love it.
love LA

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Sunday Cider

So today(even thought it was 50 degrees outside) I drug my very sweet husband(who had to miss the chiefs game) to the cidermill. We invited Rob & Sarah to come along. And I know at least Sarah and I had a good time. The first stop was for their fresh APPLE CIDER DOUGHNUTS!!!! If that doesn't float your boat we also got hot apple cider and a carmel apple. YUM. We then headed down to the pumpkin patch/corn maze. I had never been in a corn maze before and although it was fun, I think the experience could have been enhanced if it happened at night. The extra dramatic flair of darkness would have added a bit of fear. The pumpkin patch wasn't anything spectacular which, was too bad. However, Sarah and I did find the most perfect pumpkin, which neither of us bought, which, is truly a shame. (See picture below) Fun day.
Love, La

Friday, October 9, 2009


So I am introducing another segment...(I know, I know this isn't a talk show) This idea is credited to another blogger( but every friday she devotes her post to her husband and why he rocks.
My husband is the funniest person I know. He can make me laugh harder than anyone. I think laughter is very important...because if you can't laugh at yourself and in situations it makes things much harder.

We couldn't stop laughing during our wedding ceremony
My husband is so encouraging....for example. He wrote this on my fb wall tonight (I work nights)hey! just so you know, you are as beautiful as the day i met you! LOVE!
My husband is adventurous, and if it is not his idea of a great adventure he goes along with my ideas of adventure too...when we first started dating we called our date nights "adventure nights

Us in Rocky Mountain National Park at the Alpine visitor center...we took a trek up to 12005ft...(dan was not a fan of this idea but he was up for it because I wanted to go so muchMy husband loves God and always encourages my relationship with God. He has strength though God and I never have to carry a burden alone. He is always next to me taking the weight off.

people laying hands on us and praying over our marriage during our ceremony

My husband does the laundry, cleans the apt, does the dishes, often packs my lunch for me, goes to school, works part time, and then he thanks ME for working hard to provide for us. He is the hard worker. And I am so thankful for him

So its obvious...MY HUSBAND ROCKS!

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Laws of LA

So here is the deal. I am a very strongly opinionated person...and that may be an understatement. So I have decided once a week to write a segment(what, do I think people actually read this? I sound like I am on a talk show here) about things I think should be laws...or at least standards and if nothing else ADVICE EVERYONE SHOULD TAKE!! I am calling this "segment" Laws of LA (not like L.A. the city but the sound LA like as in la la la la la that you would sing as a vocal warm up. My name is Laurisa Anne and my friends often call me LA...) So Laws of LA it is.

(obviously I chose this picture to represent laws of la because anyone with their own bobble head is of great importance and their advice should be seriously considered)

1. A five point turn to get into a parking space (even if you are in an SUV and trying to fit into a tiny spot) is NEVER necessary. If you are not capable of getting into the spot in two tries give up.

-if you an in a parking garage and there is a line of cars behind you and you try to pull this little stunt you should have to go to adult time out.

-if you are one of those people that is facing the reality that you can never enter a parking space on two tries or less here are some suggestions for where to park your car and other options for you

-park in a field

-park in a completely abandoned lot

-park on the street (however under NO CIRCUMSTANCE try to parallel park)


-take the bus

-ride your bike

-roller blade

Most parks/paths/apartment complexes state that if your dog poops you must pick it up.

LAWS of LA states:

2. If your dog poops in an open area PICK IT UP!! If your dog poops in a place it can't be seen/easily stepped on you are not required to pick it up (as it is biodegradable...however the plastic bags we use to pick it up are not...funny how beauty of the land comes before good of the earth)

Here is a list of places where you are exempt from picking up the poo

- In tall grass (grass must be at least calf length and intended to be tall grass, your lawn that needs to be mowed doesn't count as "tall grass")

-I personally am glad tall grass is exempt because my very modest pooch likes to "do the dew" in tall grass

-In the bushes

-At the dog park

-In a wooded area

-And of course on your own private property

One more addendum to this rule- Although this is rather gross...If the dog is having loose/diarrhea stools they are exempt from having to be picked up.

That's all for now!


Monday, October 5, 2009


It is a very interesting thing to me how quickly I am able to regress to my former self.
And by former self...I am not talking about the above example. (Although you've got to LOVE the puff sleeves!!!)

If I lose my focus, if I let my guard down or if something unexpected comes my way I crumble. I am Gods child. Yet I let myself be defined by this world. I have had a terrible time lately in letting my confidence come from my external appearance...which isn't necessarily what I would like it to be. I let the lies from my past come flooding into my present. Lies that say I am not good enough, pretty enough, thin enough, ect, ect...

I have an amazing Husband. He tells me I am beautiful everyday. And I have an amazing God who's word tells me who I truly I am. Yet I have to CHOOSE to live in these truths. Instead of changing my clothes 100 times because I am not confident in how I look. I have to choose to believe my beauty is not only because of my looks but because of WHO I AM.
I am the daughter of a the Most High God...and the wife to a truly good man.
I refuse to be defined by 10 pounds or an ideal weight or how my clothes look on me, or how my friends are all very skinny people.

So How's That for Honesty?
I love this Picture. I felt beautiful in it. This is the me I am storing in my head. So this week I am doing a little home improvement project. Dan and I talked about how I feel last night and he encouraged me to not use our mirror this week. Of course I will use the bathroom mirror to get ready, but the full length mirror is off limits. I will believe I am beautiful because beauty doesn't come from how I look in my clothes. He is going to give me extra encouragement, and I am going to focus on the promises in Gods Word and who God says I am. Dan is such a good man...did I mention that?

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Exciting Matters at hand

First off I would like to inform everyone that HANSON...yes the Hanson brothers (mmmbop...predicesors to the Joe Bro's....The guys that had long hair and looked like girls...) YES THOSE HANSON BROTHERS were in concert last night. Where was I you might ask? At work...Huge let down. But they are back everyone! And my sixth-grade self is unashamed that I still love them.

Here is a pic from way back when (Oh how my 12year old heart throbbed for them.)

And of course a current representation (Less throbbing these days)

But still it is a shame I couldn't go to see them...They were at the Beaumont club too...I love seeing shows there.

Next item on the agenda....this update is thanks to my very reliable news informant, co-worker and friend (MS. BECKY JONES)
Although the books are over and the movies are coming to an End...we will now have the WORLD OF HARRY POTTER coming to the Universal Studios Island's Adventure near (or no-where near) you!
So for a round trip ticket (300ish bucks)
Park admission tickets (probably 75 bucks)
and spending money.....You can experience Harry's world first hand!!!
I have already started planning our trip. (Poor Dan...He hate Harry Potsmoker...or that is what he calls him)
This month we are skipping the retirement savings account to save up for HARRY POTTER over spring break!!!
Coming Spring 2010...Check out the link and sneak peek video.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Big Bully & Vaccum!

Today as I was trying to nap I could hear the shuffling of the leaves outside. Fall has a specific sound. It is the sound of rapidly drying leaves rubbing together as the wind blows through the trees. And the sound of leave that have fallens being scooted along by the wind on the concrete. I love the sound of fall.
On another note. I have taken to calling my husband two-face...cause of his burned right side of his face.

However, this is neither appropriate or kind. Because his face is hardly burned and well lets face it, its just not kind...I gave him a coin to flip to make his big decisions. He chucked it at me across the room. =) Oh, how I love our relationship.
So We also went to buy a vaccum ( a very fancy one I might hair remover and all. Wait, don't all vaccums pick up pet hair?...hummm) Well the point of my little story is that Dan wore his sunglasses into BB & B to get the vaccum. It made his burned cornea feel better. So then I started call him Ray Charles (I know, I am MEAN!!! Its all in love)

Again. This is neither appropriate or kind. First off my husband is not a black man with extremely white teeth that hugs himself. Secondly, although he has a burned cornea, he is not blind. And Third He CANNOT SING....that is self proclaimed by I am not being MEAN in saying this.
I guess the only true similarity is that they both wear sunglasses inside.
Did I mention we bought an awesome vaccum? It doesn't even have a bag. I know. I know. Impressive.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Lets Play Catch Up

So much has happened since I last updated.
Dan had an Echocardiogram through his primary care doctors It was on friday 9/11. So we didn't find out anything about it right away but the tuesday after, his doctors office called and said he was in early congestive heart failure. So obviously we freaked out and an appointment was made to see the cardiologist on the following friday. We find out thursday night that the nephrologist has a opening and we can also see him on friday. We go to the cardiologist first who gives us the news that he isn't in CHF however he does have Left ventricular hypertrophy, which is thickening of the Left ventricle due to his chronic high blood pressure. We were relieved that he wasn't in CHF but frusterated that someone told us that in the first place. The cardiologist ordered an arteriogram and possible angioplasty for the next thursday. We went to the nephrologist that afternoon and he agreed with the cardiologists decision. I loved the nephrologist. He was a very good doctor. We then went on a date to build-a-bear, silly I know but we had a fun, care-free time.
So thursday 9/24 was the big day for the arteriogram. I had to work Wednesday night but luckily someone came in at 1 for me so I could get some sleep before a very long day. He had the arteriogram which did show narrowing of his L renal artery. It is narrowed after it branches. The arteriogram and angioplasty went well and for the most part were pretty uneventful. (Dan would disagree, they had to balloon his artery 5 times and it is very painful.) However the artery opened and he had no complications. He had his femoral cath removed that evening and got to eat and get some pain meds.
The next morning Dr. Patel the cardiologist came in and gave us the diagonsis of Fibromuscular dysplasia. It means fibrin grows in the arteries instead of muscle in some places causing the artery to resemble beads/a string of pearls. So instead of being like a straw it pinces off in multiple places like a string of pearls would. It is a very rare disease that mostly affects women. Something like 80% of the time the disease is diagnosed in an autopsy. (very sobering statistic) So the plan is frequent check ups to make sure the artery remains opened, possible angioplasties, and a possible stent/although the cardiologsit said because of were the blockage is (after the artery branches) a stent isn't a great option. However at least we have a diagnosis and plan of care. I loved Dr. Patel too. He came in and just gave us a ton of information and was very good. He also said he would consult some docs with more experience in FMD to see what they thought of Dan's case.
He has been sore from the angioplasty but overall was doing well. Until tonight.... He was making dinner and grease from the frying pan splashed into his eye. So just over 48 hours after leaving the hospital from his angioplasty he went back to the ER for his eye. He has two burned spots on his face and a burned cornea. Very painful. (We are starting to feel like JOB) I had to work tonight so Dionne met us at the ER and is staying with him tonight. He has to take eye drops every two hours and is still in a lot of pain. I am trying to encourage him. I know he is feeling very discouraged. He is such a great man and works so hard, and all of this is just a lot to handle. It seems when we get a grasp on what is going on something else happens. He has to follow up with an opthimologist which is just another thing to add to his already full schedule.

We will continue to trust God. We are obviously in a time of trial and we will stay strong and praise God for all he has given us and what a merciful God he is.
Please pray that our spirits would not be discouraged.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Have no other Gods before me.

It has been a long week. I am tired and emotionally tired with all that is going on in our little family. All week I have been praying that God take care of/heal Dan. That his BP would go back to normal. I have been feeling alone in dealing with all this, not because people haven't called, just cause how to do you explain that you fears to people? I want my husband to live a healthy long life with me. I want my kids to know their father. I know what high blood pressure, especially extremely high BP does do your body and life span. So last night at church during worship I was "dialoging with God" about why this is happening to us? And the answer I got is "just trust me" so then of course I say to God "I AM TRUSTING YOU!!!" then in a calm quiet voice I heard- "No, like Abraham trusted me" then I was quiet. 
At an old Age God went to Abraham and told him to leave his people and move to the "promise land" And Abraham questions.
When Abraham and his wife were Barren God promised to make him the father of many nations, and that his decendants would be more numerous than the stars in the sky.  And he didn't question. It actually states that Abraham laughed at himself at the thought of him having a child at such an old age. Not laughed at God, but at himself. 
Then when he had a son through Hagar God told him that wasn't the promised one....No questions. 
Then when Issac is finally born God asks Abraham to take him son and offer him as a living sacrifice to God....AND ABRAHAM DIDNT QUESTION. Now of course God stopped abraham from sacrificing Issac- but God wanted to test Abraham to see if Abraham still would put God before all his earthly "possessions".
Dan and I have started tithing. Giving God 10% of our income. But somehow I missed the fact that it doesn't stop there. Everything in this earth belongs to God. And I have to trust him/give him what is his. Not only my life, but the lives of those who I care about. I think it is easy for us to say here God take our first fruits, take all this stuff- but (insert name/person here) is mine. Dan is my person, I care more about him than anyone/anything it is very hard for me to say okay God- He is yours. I TRUST YOU. With whatever path you have for him. And I know that no matter what happens you have a plan for our lives and will never leave us or stop taking care of us. 
God required so much of Abraham...I have one single test and fall apart. 
God is Good and Faithful. 

Friday, September 11, 2009

Perspective is a funny thing

So tonight is my first night back at work since the beginning of our "Labor Day BP Saga". I feel like I am being more observant with how familys react and what happens since I have now been on the other side of the health care system. For the most part I am very proud of how we treat patients and how through we are here at Childrens Mercy. I know I will never want to take my children anywhere else. It is very odd to me how easily I relax back into this side of health care. I have the power to look up lab results, to know what the plan of care is and to know what is going on. And I have the responsibility to communicate those things with my patients and their families. That is what has been so frustrating about this whole process with Dan's BP-that we didn't know what was going on and that even when I would ask specific questions I wouldn't get the answers. Right now I am not super hopeful that much good will come from Dan's high bp or that it will even be an easy road to get it solved, or an easy road in the future- however I do think experiencing being the scared, lost spouse will help me be a better nurse. I chose to be a nurse because there is a gap between the health care diagnosis and the emotional connection/well being of the families. Nurses help bridge that gap. We help explain diagonsis in laymans terms after the doctors have moved on to their next patient. We answer questions and teach the patient/family the best way to care for their new diagnosis. We care and we are the ones to ask "are you okay" when a parent/patient is upset or unsure. Yesterday dan said "I feel like none of the doctors care that I am dying faster than the average person" Where was the nurse advocating for him during his hospital stay? I feel like his experience in the hosptial was a huge failure both for the doctors and especially for the nurses. Above all we are advocates for our patients. And that is what his hospital stay lacked. It lacked a driving force pushing to find out what the problem was it lacked an advocate. So if nothing else I have become a better nurse through all of this. It has helped me professionally. And I guess that is something.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

So since Dan got released form the hospital on Monday (Its now Wednesday) it has been a frustrating experience. We have spoken to the Nephrologists office to try to move up his Octover 6th appointment. We cannot wait an entire month to figure out what is going on. His BP has still been high 210/140 yesterday AM. We made an appointment with his primary care doc today. I had never met the guy- he is a ass! We brought up our concerns and his response was "well he has had high blood pressure forever"...yah that is not a good response. We were there to talk about options, do some diagnostic tests and to figure out what is going on.  Not to be told "well it has been high forever" I am frustrated because I want to know WHAT  IS MAKING IT SO HIGH!! and then work on getting the problem fixed. 
I am scared to say the least! This is the most important person in my life. And this stuff that is going on is not only scary because of the immediate danger of it, but also because of the future danger/serious complications of chronic hypertension. I am trying to not freak out and to be strong about the whole thing, but honestly I am beginning to fail miserably. I am very emotional and a second away from tears constantly. I cried on the way home from the doctors office today.  I know it isn't helpful, it makes Dan feel bad- he already feels bad. None of this is his fault/and it isn't anything he can control. I wish he wouldn't internalize it and take it on himself. So I feel that our life is kinda falling apart, and until we have some answers it is going to be hard to start feeling better about it. I asked Dan today why all this is happening, I know he couldn't answer, but I feel like we have the worst luck! Its not fair. I am trying to trust God and remember that he is ALWAYS faithful to me. His word also has so many promises to us. Here are a few I read in John Today.

John 14:13 And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. 14You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.

John 14: 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

John 15: 7If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.

John 16  33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

So once again tonight We are trusting in our faithful Father and glad that we have each other.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Life just keeps happening

This has truly been a "long weekend" aside from it being a holiday weekend I think to date it may be the longest lasting weekend of my life.  Dan woke me up saturday morning and said his stomach hurt really bad, after pulling out all my nursing skills and doing a quick abdominal assessment-we headed to the ER for possible appendicitis. It definitely was appendicitis, which my thought on that was 'no problem quick fix'. But then we ran into a bigger problem. Dans Blood Pressure in the ER was 240/140 at its highest. For anyone with minor medical knowledge- that is a very very high uncommon pressure- because people usually don't live with a BP that high. Dan has had past issues with BP due to a kidney problem and thought it was pretty much dealt with. So anyway we spent 2 nights in the ICU because they had to wait to take his appendix out until his BP went down. He was put on a Nicardipine drip and had a Arterial line to measure his blood pressure. Yesterday they switched him to oral meds along with the drip and then at 3am they turned off the drip. They moved him from ICU around 1030 and we were on our way home by 1230. From a surgical standpoint he is doing VERY well! He is sore and has some gas pain from the appendectomy but overall he is recovering well! However on the BP issue we truly don't know what is going on. He is on two oral meds and we are monitoring his BP from home. We will follow up with the nephrologist to figure out what exactly his going on, to take a look at his kidneys and his heart and other arteries that may have been damaged by his BP being so high. 
So that is the medical side. As far as the emotional side. I had a very sleepless night Saturday night. Luckily I had dans pocket bible in my purse and was able to spend time in the word and just praying. It was the first time I was truly alone to process. Dan was sleeping his parents had gone home, my parents had gone home.  It is a terrifying thought to have the most precious thing in your life be threatened. All I could do was let go and say "God-all of this stuff is yours anyway. Please take care of us, you have always been faithful. I know you are faithful" It is just a very interesting thing to have your faith tested like that...not to mention our brand new marriage. Lets talk about reality check. We certainly are getting to the sicker (and soon to be poorer) part of our vows quicker than we would have liked. 
Dan is disappointed and feels discouraged about this news. He is a strong man and doesn't like to be in a weak state, or to feel like he is a burden. He is not thrilled about the prospect of his upcoming appointments and tests to figure out what is going on- he hates the Dr/Hospital. And he isn't happy about being on BP meds from here forward or our new LOW SODIUM DIET!! (Im not too happy about that either) 
So thats the update with the Ballews. We are emotionally drained. Extremely Tired and Hanging on by a thread tonight. But we are thankful to have each other and thankful that we have a God that holds us in his hands and never ever leaves us. 

Monday, August 10, 2009

Random thoughts for today

I am feeling inspired to write. 

During some of my most formative years I dated a guy that always treated me like I wasn't good enough. It was a very unhealthy overly dependent relationship for both of us. The things he said to me still swim through my head. He once told me I am a "cute girl" but not the kinda girl that guys turn their heads to look at. Or something close to that. I find it odd that the things he chose to think were inferior in me are things that I cannot change. I remember him saying that he would be really disappointed if I gained weight after I had kids.  THANK GOD I DID NOT HAVE KIDS WITH HIM... Not to say I plan on gaining 100 pounds or something but isn't a woman's body changing at least some what inevitable? 
I was listening to the radio on the way home tonight and a song came on about a woman who "looks so much better without him" I cannot agree more. I feel confident in myself now. (It helps that I have a very encouraging husband who loves me for me) I can stand in front of the mirror on most days and like what I see. I am not self conscious about the way I act or what I wear. I do have my melt downs and "fat days" however on the whole I like myself. 
I am so thankful for being able to see the truth about myself. Not only has Dan helped me find me again, but looking into the Word and what God says about me is also a wonderful way to love yourself. 
I wish all those girls out there that are not loved the way they should be could see the truth about themselves. 

Side note Mira and I have started a running program. It feels good to get back out there and run again. I say I am doing if for her good...however I am sure that is just a mind game I am playing with myself. 
We have run four days now. I got new shoes and then  aquired two new blisters after todays run. But my back isn't hurting so its an even trade. I am having to walk some in between. But we have been running at least a mile each day. I would say we ran 1.5 today. We found a pond down the path that she LOVES to swim swimming for me =).


Saturday, July 25, 2009

Dan and I's wedding was great. It was the best day of my life so far! Everything was perfect. It was awesome. The honeymoon was wonderful and we are adjusting to married life very well. We have been very busy- a weekend at the lake, and we are off to colorado on tuesday for 9 days. It was all been great, although I have missed/worked through church for the last few weeks. It has been discouraging not to go. The last time I went we discussed Abiding in God. Just spending quality time with him daily. So far I have been doing okay with that. I am loving it and truly Long for it. I have mainly been reading through Ephesians. The verse that has been very much on my heart says something like do not say anything unless it is encouraging to others according to their needs. That is definately something i have been working on and meditating on. I also have been thinking a lot about the junk that we put into our heads. Through what we watch and listen to. We are not called to this world, but to be transformed. We are new creations are we acting like it? Just some things to think about.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Two weeks...

I haven't written for a bit. In just two short weeks I will marry my love! It is very crazy. I am so blessed to be with such an incredible man. I have been reviewing my life lately thinking about the past and I can honestly say I am SO glad Dan came into my life when he did. Gods timing is so very perfect. I know things were messy in the beginning of our relationship. However, I truly was caught up in a poor relationship that was going no where and although timing seemed to be a bit inconvienient, it truly seems perfect now.
A few weeks ago I went back to Dan wengers old bedroom at his friends house and had some girls pray over me to just be free of all the guilt, and bonds that hold me so tightly to him even when there is so much time between us. God is Good. I feel the bonds of my past have been released. I feel free to be who God wants me to be and not have to constantly be staring through a veil of my past. Dan wenger has been on my mind a lot though. Emily gives me updates every so often and it sounds like he is doing pretty poorly. I hope someday he is able to see how much he is loved by others and by God. Anyway on to brighter topics!
I only have four more shifts until I am off for the wedding. YAY! Work is very over-rated. However I am thankful to have a job. We are completing all our wedding tasks and are ready to relax and enjoy!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

The sea is churning....

For a while now I have been feeling that God is calling me to step out of my current life situation and begin to follow him first. So this week at 61 they announced that The Gathering is going to become its own church seperate from Heartland. This whole concept scares me. Jon our pastor made the illustration that God is calling the Gathering to get out of the boat and come to him on the water. And of course that is a very scary thing. Over the last few days I am becomming more comfortable with the idea and truly preparing myself to become a leader in this new step. I am not a follower... I never have been and it is time to stop having one foot out of and one foot in the boat. God says he hates lukewarm christians...he spews them out of his mouth. I am a luke warm follower of Christ and it is time to turn up the temperature!
I need to become a woman who prays without ceasing and who lives her life in the word. I am excited about the changes but scared.
After 61 at the Gathering we sang this song multiple times that says "I will not be afraid, I will not be ashamed for you are with me, you are with me. And I've seen enough to know, that you're my only hope. I don't want to go if you're not with me."

I will not be afraid. If God is for me, who can be against me!
In other news, we have less than two months until I become Mrs Laurisa Ballew. I am excited. I need to relax, put my mind at ease and just have fun in the next two months. There is stuff left to do, but I really have to just get my mind ready to have fun on that day. I am honestly super stressed about it, which isn't necessary, but just how I am. SO RELAX is my motto. It will be wonderful without me trying to control every single detail.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Its fun to be showered.

So...saturday was my first shower and bachelorette party! I cannot believe how much I enjoyed myself. First of all the shower was beautiful! Emily did a wonderful job on everything! Laci came in Thursday and I really enjoyed spending time with her. I got most of my big items at my shower. It was very fun to take all the stuff home and fill my cabinets with it. Then I also got incredible things at my bachelorette party! Plus I got a huge compliment. One of my friends said to Emily "Laurisa always gives the best gifts so I want to give her a really great gift" Wow! That makes me feel really good! I was really happy with everything. I had a great time.

Last week we also started looking at Dogs. We found an adorable little puppy. She is a mix, her mom was australian shepard and lab and her dad was blue heeler. She is so sweet. We brought her home today! I couldn't be more excited! I felt like we had to wait an eternity to get her (from friday to now) so I am just glad she is home with us. On the way home she was so scared in the car. She did a super cute thing and put her head in the door. Here are a couple pictures to show you our new baby! We named her MIRA (like mira, mira, on the wall- thanks laci for that quote)

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Praise God for many Blessings!!

Praise God I finally found table cloths for the wedding!! Emily (my MOH) and I went looking for them on Monday. I am so glad she agreed to go with me. We got so much accomplished that day and I truly felt blessed to have someone to just go do all the tedius tasks with me. The swatch on the Left is about the right color of the ones we decided to use. Then paired with the green apples I think it will look supurb!! We also figured out the wedding favors and how they will look/be packaged. Another thing I am pleased about. So both of those things are a huge blessings! So then the other news is that we may get a puppy. We have been looking at a couple that are very cute and we are going to see some on Friday. I am excited. And then the other big thing is that we have completed our first month of The Dave Ramsey method/ Complete money makeover(CMM). We put $1500 in savings this month. Now that won't be typical for us however it was a great start. This month I have adjusted a few things to hopefully make the CMM work better I added a giving section so that we have a place to drawn from when we have gifts we want to give. I also increased areas that were hard/impossible last month. Example- Dan and I like to eat out, it is just something we enjoy doing together so I increased the Eat out budget from 60 to 80 dollars. I also Added money to our wedding fund. We are honeymooning in Mexico- so dan is going to need swim trunks and I need a suit or two, so that stuff can come from that fund. I am truly proud that our saving went up this month. I hope to have almost 5 thousand dollars by the wedding. (I'm sure some of it will have to be spent on the wedding, but who knows) Anyway...Hooray for some major victories this month. I will update about puppy news. asap