So since Dan got released form the hospital on Monday (Its now Wednesday) it has been a frustrating experience. We have spoken to the Nephrologists office to try to move up his Octover 6th appointment. We cannot wait an entire month to figure out what is going on. His BP has still been high 210/140 yesterday AM. We made an appointment with his primary care doc today. I had never met the guy- he is a ass! We brought up our concerns and his response was "well he has had high blood pressure forever"...yah that is not a good response. We were there to talk about options, do some diagnostic tests and to figure out what is going on.  Not to be told "well it has been high forever" I am frustrated because I want to know WHAT  IS MAKING IT SO HIGH!! and then work on getting the problem fixed. 
I am scared to say the least! This is the most important person in my life. And this stuff that is going on is not only scary because of the immediate danger of it, but also because of the future danger/serious complications of chronic hypertension. I am trying to not freak out and to be strong about the whole thing, but honestly I am beginning to fail miserably. I am very emotional and a second away from tears constantly. I cried on the way home from the doctors office today.  I know it isn't helpful, it makes Dan feel bad- he already feels bad. None of this is his fault/and it isn't anything he can control. I wish he wouldn't internalize it and take it on himself. So I feel that our life is kinda falling apart, and until we have some answers it is going to be hard to start feeling better about it. I asked Dan today why all this is happening, I know he couldn't answer, but I feel like we have the worst luck! Its not fair. I am trying to trust God and remember that he is ALWAYS faithful to me. His word also has so many promises to us. Here are a few I read in John Today.

John 14:13 And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. 14You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.

John 14: 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

John 15: 7If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.

John 16  33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

So once again tonight We are trusting in our faithful Father and glad that we have each other.

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