Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Life Lessons Learned. Slowly

Every day I learn something new. My oldest, oh how she challenges me, as I am sure my youngest will too. I am learning life lessons. Slowly. But surely.
I am learning I must take care of myself- To get good rest, remember to eat- (and not just junk), remember to drink- (and not just coffee) And workout- (so I can be strong, healthy,well). All so I can care for my little girls, my husband, family and friends in return.

I am learning to be patient. To speak quietly, directly, and have high expectations, as well as a large amount of grace for Emmaus.
I am learning that my grief for her diagnosis comes in waves. It comes at unexpected times. And usually in those situations the Lord speaks to me quietly, directly, and with lots of grace.
I am learning to pray with my girls. To start the day with prayer, to model worship, to pray when we part, to pray when I am frustrated, or they are frustrated (or fussy-for Shiloh).
I am learning that "Special Needs" or not, there are expectations, and responsibilities that I need to have for Emmaus.


I am learning that babies get bored & have strong opinions. (Two things Emmaus never did as a baby)
I am learning that babies can be sleep trained. (Thank you sweet Jesus)
I am enjoying (and not taking for granted) the milestones being hit, (without hours and hours of practice).
I am enjoying the sweet kisses, that at only 5 months Shiloh "knows" me, and prefers me.


I am enjoying the budding sisterhood.
The lessons that will be learned and taught between the two of them.
The giggles that now go back and forth.
The Oh-So-Wet kisses they exchange.
I even love that Shiloh wanted Emmaus' attention the other day and Emmaus squealed in a not so kind way and gave her a harsh little wave- signaling "not right now little sister".  

Lots of lessons being learned around here.

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Tuesday, January 7, 2014

silence

I feel that my blog silence is deafening. I am sad that I haven't blogged about Halloween and how my girls were little penguins. AND SO CUTE. Or Thanksgiving- which I worked,  but we still did "Steaksgiving" with my family. Or Christmas even. Emmaus ended up in the ER in the morning due to respiratory distress- no worries she got to come home and enjoy a very sick kinda lame Christmas- that was so laid back and exactly the type of rest we needed. (We didn't even ever put our tree up) She got two gifts- she loved both. Shiloh got zero gifts (from us at least) cause...well cause she was 4 months old and  didn't know the difference- but we loved her well, snuggled her and that was more than enough for her!

I have been silent. And I am not sure why.

       Today while driving down the road I started tearing up. Overwhelmed with the blessings we have been given. In awe of how awesome our big girl is doing.  She remains seizure free. She is learning, and growing, and understanding more and more each day. She has WAY too many opinions. She is saying more words. As of January 1 she is only on one seizure med.  And there is a huge difference in her demeanor. We are lucky. And we are thankful. We will never be "out of the woods" with TS, and she still has many delays and much progress to be made, but we are so thrilled she is doing so well.
Then there is Shiloh. I cannot even tell you the Joy of getting to parent her. The rest I find in having a "typical" kid. The ease of not fearing seizures, or illness. Shiloh is smart and attentive, she  is concerned about
those around her- she seeks out Emmaus- tries to engage with her. It is the sweetest thing. She is a funny baby. She is an old soul.
I feel so lucky to have them. They are so very different- and so much fun. This hasn't been an easy transition, but I feel so thankful to have both of them.
I am thankful for a healthy 2013, a healthy birth, healthy baby, and Emmaus who has been (mostly) healthy. We have had every cold, strep throat, stomach bug (and dan has been sick about 100000 times) But we truly overall have been healthy. Nothing major.   And to that I let out a slow exhale and hope the same for 2014.

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