Having faith while moving forward.
Having faith while moving forward.
It is hard and somewhat discouraging to ask God for big things and having them work out differently than what we've asked for. I've written before about believing not only that God CAN do big things, but having the faith to believe he WILL do big things. But what happens when what your asking for isn't God's plan? Yah- it sucks. Especially when you are vulnerable to really believe that he WILL do those things.
Today as I was reading Matthew's account of Jesus's final days I read something interesting. Three times in the Garden Jesus prayed for God to take the burden of death from him but to give him strength if it is what he must endure (okay I totally paraphrased that, but whatever)
It is comforting that even Christ was in my shoes. That he asked God for things to be different yet continued to walk forward trusting God's plan.
So last 10 months I have been learning about faith. About having radical, crazy, vulnerable, unbelievable faith that God will come through in big ways. And now I am having to learn the second part. About continuing to move forward, to believe, to trust, while waiting or even if those things don't happen.
I feel weak tonight. I feel tired and let down. I am discouraged with how Emmaus is doing. I am longing for her to be developing more, seizing less, and for TSC to be something that does not affect our lives so drastically.
I don't want to be on this road. I don't want this to be our story. And while I will ever be praying for a miracle, for a daughter that is free of this disease and a life that has less trials...I will continue to walk forward. To follow God's plan. Cause its better than mine anyway.
Luckily- I know just like Jesus did that while the road here may be hard. There is hope in the resurrection. That sickness, suffering, trials and death are only part of the story. Thank you God for that reality.
Philippians 2:8
And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the
point of death, even death on a cross.
Love,
La
It is Wednesday morning and I just read your blog...and cried. This is a hard lesson to learn...the second part as you call it. One we don't want to know but one that explains so much. And it is a truth that often makes people turn their backs on God because it can be very hard to understand and accept. I thank the Lord that he has taken you there and helped you see and that your love/faith is not wavering.
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