Third day morning, first breaths of Christ

Spring seems to finally have arrived- after our late march snow storm I am hoping for few april showers and just Lots of nice days.
MY SOUL NEEDS NICE DAYS.
Thursday was particularly nice- and I got a chance to go for a walk- alone. Yeah- that pretty much never happens.
I was listing to my standard "birthing play list" which kinda needs a new name- It was a bunch of worship music I had to listen to when I was in labor with Emmaus- many songs have been added and deleted in the two years of it's existence but its overall some of my favorites.

I was just struck on this walk at the goodness of the Lord. I was recounting our journey over the last few years.  Thinking of the babe growing in my belly. And the hope and redemption of having a healthy child. The hope of a new life after a miscarriage.  Considering my sister in law who also miscarried who found out this week they are having a healthy little boy this summer. The joy of us having babies so close together.
Considering the growth of my daughter. The fun stage she is in. The growth we see in her every day.
Yesterday Dan got out to pump gas and I told Emmaus"Your dada is out pumping gas for us".  And in her baby babble she said both dada and gas, clearly.  The way she hugs and kisses her baby doll, her (although at times challenging) newfound opinions. These changes swell my heart. They make me overwhelmed with the goodness of the Lord.

Our Easter service focused on peoples stories of "I was as good as dead" and then how they were redeemed. Well in the last few years I have felt as good as dead multiple times.

-Learning at 34 weeks pregnant of a disease called Tuberous Sclerosis
-Seeing my Child seize for the first time, hoping I had seen wrong, but knowing in my heart it had started.
-Discouragement of a flat head, and Emmaus needing glasses *both I can say were redeemed with cute pink accessories*
-Realizing Emmaus' chewing & swallowing problems
-The overwhelming times that come with all my very special daughter requires- along with just being a parent for the first time.
-A miscarriage
- A Brain surgery that felt like a gamble, and the decision that Brain surgery was indeed "right" for our baby.

But in all of these things we have never been dead, or alone. So today on Easter sunday when I reflect the sacrifice that Jesus made for me, to redeem my life. To give me LIFE. And the emptiness of the tomb early that sunday morning. That the man called Christ was Alive. Had conquered death for you and I. I can't help but truly know the goodness of the Lord.
To reflect over the last 2 years and fight back tears knowing that my life has truly been redeemed. That in every situation- the Lord offers me redemption. That his goodness will & does conquer the hardship of this earthly life.

Gungor has a song called "This is not the End"
Which I feel like is a motto I need to hear in my life.
"This. Is. Not. The. End. Come Alive! Like third day morning- FIRST breaths of Christ."

I can only imagine being physically dead and taking my first breaths of air.
But I can say speaking in a spiritual meaning- I have felt defeated, I have felt trampled, worn out, "as good as dead"
And those first breaths when I remember to let Christ rein in my life- they are glorious. They are redeeming.
They are good.
Praying for "third day morning, first breaths of Christ" for you and for me today.