Almost every night for the last several months (and by several I mean all the months she has been alive) Emmaus wakes up at night. In the last few months it is more like she takes two naps at night one from about 9-2 then again from about 430am-7am.  We have tried many many things to try to get her to sleep. 
-Having a later or earlier bed time
-Different bedtime routines
-Bringing her into our bed to sleep when she wakes up (which worked for a little but now she just keeps both of us up too)
-Sleeping with her on the couch (this is so either dan and I can be sleeping. no use in 3 people being awake instead of just 2)
-Rocking her
-Letting her grunt it out. (the kid rarely cries, just grunts to show her dissatisfaction) 
-Feeding her in the middle of the night
-Not feeding her at night
-Patting her back in her crib
Point is...none of those things work. I have mentioned this problem to several friends and we get different advice from everyone....none of those things have really worked either. She is just awake. So we have stopped fighting it. Now we read to her, sing to her, and last night I actually let her play for a while. 

There she is just pounding away at her toy at 3am.

I tend to lean more towards the  "cry it out" parenting method for her children her age, but something in my mommy gut says "just get up with her." (I wonder how it will be with my future children.) I guess because Emmaus is so chill and mostly happy, I don't trust myself completely to know when she needs something. Plus she isn't the best about being able to express her needs yet. So it bothers me to know she is just chilling in her crib for 3ish hours. 
It has truly been frustrating at times and we are definitely tired...very tired. LIKE REALLY TIRED. But let me tell you it is so much easier to get up when my expectation is to play with her for a while, or read to her instead of to try to get her back to sleep. Cause that way I'm not getting frustrated at her for being wide awake. (I'm talking eyeballs completely open, laughing and gibber gabbering away-AWAKE) 

She is truly a mystery to me. I wonder what is like for her? Is her brain going crazy and keeping her awake? Is it a med thing? Is it a TS thing? Or is she just a night owl? Is she tired and just can't sleep? Or really just wide awake? 
I am so thankful she is a happy child (and that she takes good naps during the day). I truly might lose my mind other wise. 
Man this parenting thing sure isn't easy. But I trust my gut. So for now I will get up with her. And I will STRIVE to be joyful in those early hours of the morning- making them a sweet time instead of a hard time.  (And I will fail miserably half the time, but "luckily" I know tomorrow night I will get another chance to choose to love Emmaus well in these difficult moments and be joyful...) 

That's all for now.

“The night is the hardest time to be alive and 4am knows all my secrets.” 
 Poppy Z. Brite


  1. My advice is follow that gut. It's the best tool the Lord gave you! Hoping she gives you a long night's sleep soon! You're an awesome mommy!

  2. Will pray for sleep. I used to hear Rylee in her bed in the middle of the night talking to her mobile. Jabber jabber, laugh laugh. It was real cute the first time. And then not so much after that. Now Maggie is going through that. She comes in around 2am and talks to me for an hour. Sometimes she's real nice and tickles my cheek until I fall asleep. Then she's real mean and tells me to wake up. Or maybe she'll just push on my nose and giggle. It's real cute for the first 15 seconds. Then I mostly just wished we could all sleep. Godspeed sister.


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