Worry Wart

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33

Thank you Jesus! Man oh man did I need to hear that verse today. Yesterday was a rough day for miss Emmaus and thus for mommy too- really mommy had a rough morning today. She just was out of sorts yesterday. She cried A LOT. I have mentioned before this child doesn't cry. She gets fussy, she grumbles sometimes, but she doesn't really cry. I heard her cry more yesterday than I have in last 6 weeks combined! She wasn't super alert, she was grumpy and she was super hard to console. I wasn't sure if she was sick, or just uncomfortable, or what was going on.
Here is the thing. I know that babies having "off days" is completely normal. However, in our case I also know there is a high likely hood that even though she is a completely "normal" baby right now there may be a day that her "normal" changes a lot. So when she has an off day I think to myself- is this the beginning of her having neurological problems? Is this the end of "normal" for us? When she cries and it is high pitched and she grumbles and it is high pitched...I think does that sound like a "neuro" cry? (When babies have neurological problems their cry is different, it is really high pitched and shrill a lot of the times). I am pretty sure any of my nurse friends upon hearing her cry would say- "No its not a neuro cry" you are just worried.
WORRY. BAH. Can I say I hate worrying?!? I will admit to over thinking everything, I dissect things, and plan way to much...(my plans rarely work out) but I wouldn't classify myself as high anxiety or worrisome. And I think I would worry about a healthy baby- but GEEZ LOUISE having a baby with health complications I worry far to much and have way too much anxiety. I am working on it. Every day I am working on it. Every day I work on casting my cares on the Lord, laying my daughters life and well-being in his hands and releasing my death grip of worry. Cause I hate worrying and I hate having anxiety. Cause that's just not who I am.
I have the best friends. They keep me grounded. They encourage me to let go of the above mentioned death grip of worry. They love Dan and I and our daughter well. They pray for me- I mean I texted a group of people to pray for me this AM and seriously about 5 minutes later one showed up at my door to pray for us! Yah- that's how great my friends are. (Thing is I wouldn't have been shocked if any of them had done that!) I am thankful I have a community of people to walk alongside me in life. How do people do this alone?!?!
Today Emmaus is much better. She has been very alert, her UNcrabby self and even flashed me a few smiles. (Which pretty much makes my heart melt into a pool of mush!)
She is just the sweetest little gal. And I am so thankful to have HER as my daughter. Even if the little stinker causes me to worry.
Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
I think that's it for now.
Love, La
Oh- yah P.S. Stanley the stump seriously fell off about 45 minutes after my post yesterday- I guess he was just waiting for his day in the blog spotlight before his departure!


  1. She is just amazing and she will continue to melt your heart every single day & worry you once in a while, but you are doing a pretty bang up job! BTW, Matthew now has a Sing-a-magig and keeps asking when "Maus" (May-us) can come over with hers :)!

  2. Sorry it was a hard day yesterday! We are still praying for a miracle healing for Emmaus and in the meantime, I am praying that the Lord gives your heart peace in the "normal" bad days so that you can recognize any "abnormal" bad days that may come. Years ago, in a moment of crisis, I was praying for help and I heard the Lord say to me 6 simple words: "you will know what to do." It seemed like no help at the time, but what I've learned that means is that in a moment where action is needed, God will give me the instinct and conviction I need to make the right decisions. There have since been several similar crisis prayer moments (most have been parenting-related, if you can imagine that!) when I have heard that same gentle reminder "You will know what to do." In other words, "I've given you instincts. Trust me by trusting them." I am praying that you will hear/feel a similar word from God in your moments of fear and worry. You are the PERFECT mama for that PERFECT babe.


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