Standing up without falling apart
This year has broken me more than any before. I have often felt alone. Yet I am still confident we are moving in the right direction as a family. It is hard when relationships change and fall away. It is hard to accept that differences in belief, or philosophy, or perspective might truly be greater than any commonality or connection can hold together. And my perspective, and expectations in some of my relationships have shifted drastically this year. And it breaks me up. I have felt so bound by the ropes of Tuberous Sclerosis. A fear of loss I have never faced before this year- and the anxiety it produces after its threat has past has not ceased to be present. And in all of this I keep coming back to the fact she is not mine to keep. But the heaviness that comes with the words “incurable disease” have settled in. Along with the continued daily grind of therapies, school schedules, doctors appointments, and illness. A few weeks ago during worship at church I so clearly
