Saturday, March 28, 2009

Snow in spring?

So I woke up this afternoon to a scant amount of snow outside. By the time I was ready to leave for work 5:50pm. It was pretty much a blizzard outside. There was so much freaking snow! IT IS ALMOST APRIL PEOPLE!!! You can never count on the midwest to get its seasons right. This is a picture of downtown. Obviously not taken today, but you get the point of how it looks covered in snow. I work downtown however you can't see my building. It is just a few blocks to the right of this picture. That is the old train station featured in the picture.

I got up at 3 today and pretty much just layed in bed until I had to get ready. I just wasn't feeling the productivity. I have been so busy with work lately its a bit nuts. I do get two nights in a row off this week. Then I have to work 2 days then Laci is coming into town. My first shower and bachelorette party are this weekend! YAY!! I am very excited. I also get paid this week...Another exciting thing. Everything is costing so much money lately! It is LAME! I am very thankful for a secure Job and paychecks that are consistant. Dan and I are thinking about getting a Dog for our wedding present to each other. It would be kinda fun I have to admit. Although then we have to be responsible for a being besides ourselves. I have been looking on petfinder and they have some CUTE dogs to adopt!! We need to seriously think about it. It would be a quick addition to our brand new family! Something to ponder at least.

I wrote out a list today of everything I need to do for the wedding. It was OVERWHELMING! I called dan in a panic and he was very kind. He basically told me to chill and everything would work out fine. I know it will. I just have a lot left to do and time is running shorter and shorter everyday.
I am truly struggling loving Dans family. The kind of struggling I just need to get on my knees and ask God to take any unhealthy thoughts out of my mind. I just need to love them. However hard it might be. I definatly need to spend some time on my knees about it.
I went out last night with a bunch of girls from nursing school. It was Azitas b-day. I had a good time for the most part but one of the girls and I butted heads a lot. There is just a lot of conflict in that relationship. I feel like it is the same thing with Rob and Sarah. So much stuff has gone unsaid that probably should have been cleared up ages ago. So at this point it would just be bringing up old crap.
It is suppost to snow today. It has been so nice the last couple of weeks and then today...snow. GOT TO LOVE KS WEATHER!! I did receive a huge crate and barrel package in the mail today. My first shower and bachelorette party is Next saturday. I am very excited. Hopefully it is warm by then.
Here are a couple goals for this week.
-Be positive!! Positive about wedding stuff, about family and about work!
-Don't worry! I am not going to worry about the parties this weekend. They aren't my problem just are for me to enjoy.
-Spend time in the word daily and pray for my family
I think all this is going to take more time than I have!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I have been doing a lot of planning for the wedding. We are having a "green" theme. We are using green apples as centerpieces. The bridesmaids dresses are green along with several other things in the wedding. The price is green. LOTS AND LOTS OF IT! So here is one centerpiece pic I stumbled across that I love. I think the split peas along with the green apple and orchid are just super cute. I need to figure other things my hair. Dan has been so great about the whole process. I tend to stress about things, but he just pitches in and helps and then tries to calm me down. Today he came over before I left for work (I work nights at a childrens hospital) so he offered to make my lunch. -He is truly that nice of a guy. Then he told me how beautiful I was-I just washed my face and my hair was wet when he got there. I looked like CRAP! however I guess he doesn't care. Truly I don't think I could have found a better man. God is so good to have blessed me with him. To understand that statement in its entirety I must explain a little about my past. I fell in love for the first time at age 17. He was wonderful...or I thought so at least. Dan (both guys are named dan) So dan wenger is adventurous, he loves to spend money and he laughs harder than anyone I have ever known. Not to mention he is extremely attractive. However I fell in love with him and we had a lot of fun together for quite a while. After a while he wanted to date around. To make sure I was the "one" then his bestfriend when I was away at college was a girl. Finally he confessed in an overdramatic way that he was in love with her, and he love me too, but just wasn't in love with me anymore. So of course I was all broken up about him. For what seemed like eternity. 4 years is just a long time to date someone. Then we were on again off again for a while till I met my dan, Dan Ballew. I wasn't so sure about him at first. But he truly is the kindest most sincere person I have ever met. He loves hard. And would do anything for those he loves. He truly treats me like a queen. For once in my life I discovered how a woman should be treated, I shouldn't have to fight for everything I want in live D.W. was very selfish and always made me fight. Not to mention he broke my heart in a million pieces. Of course he wanted me back once my dan came along. He realized what he was loosing I guess. I still miss him sometimes. However I would NEVER trade what I have. I just regret that things couldn't have been different. So back to my dan. We actually get to hang out tomorrow. Me working nights and him in school and working is hard on our together time. However we always have fun and the time we spend together is so precious to me. Okay enough for now. I have stuff to do at work.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

A new beginning

I had a blog a long time ago. I mean a LONG time ago. I really updated it frequently, but then I just stopped using it. So lets try this again. I think it is a good idea and kinda a fun thing to do. Plus with the amount that I think about things it can't hurt to write down some thoughts and ideas.
So here is a bit about me
I have great friends. People who love me and who I love back. Girls that have been around since elementry school. New friends from nursing school, I am just truly blessed by friends.
I have the the best fiance in the world. He is worth all his family drama. The pic is of him and I obviously. He would do anything for me, it is kinda incredible actually.
I have been majorly hurt by a man, causing scars that to this day I am not over, I have a great fiance, but still the scars from D.W. run deep. I am above being treated the way he treated me and choose to find my happiness and partnership with a man who will give as much into the relationship as I will and who will treat me with love, kindness and respect everyday.
I love my job although I totally have spring fever and don't want to spend all day sleeping and all night working. I will deal with it though.
I am so excited for our wedding and our future. Dan is just incredible (I may have mentioned that before) and I can't wait for the big day. Although I am completely stressed out about the planning of the event.
Oh and I love Jesus and strive to become more like him. I stink at it, but I am trying
I guess that is enough for now.